A confession and a realization (23 of 30)

For years I have been a bad Christmas gift buyer. I always thought that it was mostly because I don't listen well enough when people talk about what they like (and that may be part of it), or that I hate shopping (and that may be part of it) or that I am cheap (that may be part of it).... but after some soul searching while watching the hockey game tonight - I have come to a discovery.

It is not my fault..... I have a money spending disability.

Now - that is different than just being cheap. In fact, truth be told, I like giving gifts to people (I gave a working Toro Snow blower to a buddy of mine the other day... a real honest to goodness real snow blower - for nothing!!!). I have a problem and you should not judge me..... let me describe it.

All year long, I buy virtually nothing for myself. Ok - while that sentence is true in the fact that I am mostly a kept man and Sari does all the household shopping etc - that is not what I mean. What I do mean is that whenever I go to buy something, it has to pass the "Do I need it?" test... and if it doesn't I usually don't buy it. This applies to big things (like new motorcycles) and even down to little things (Do I NEED a coke? Likely not - so I just drink water).

So here is the issue.... after doing that for 355 days of the year, how am I supposed to start spending money in the 10 days that I may go Christmas shopping?

I look at stuff and think, "Well, I could buy that... it is nice.. but do they need it? NO!" and that is where it ends. Then I look at something else and think, "But will they use it or will it sit in the drawer forever until it goes to the garage sale box..... probably 'garage sale' so NO!"

If I had a guarantee that every gift would be perfect and useful I would spend like crazy.... but just to buy something so that I can say that I bought someone something goes against everything that I do all year long (I was going to say "goes against every fiber of my being" but that was likely a little to "Oprah melodramatic" so I didn't say it). I don't even treat myself so I am I supposed to do that for others?

So rather than feel badly about myself for my lack of gift buying enthusiasm.... I think I am going to start ranting - to everyone I see - about how commercialized and stupid Christmas has become..... and if that doesn't help them maybe I will seek therapy.

So does anyone out there know how to spend money frivolously? I may need to take a course.

Apply in the comments section of this post.... Sari tells me the credit card is clear and ready and waiting. :)